In a nutshell

Well,i don't talk much about my family on this blog but today,i just have to say something.
I have an aunt who sometimes is nice but sometimes is a total BITCH!She drives me nuts!She is all over my business and is too much sometimes.I know she says she wants what is best for me,but i don't think that entails her being all over my life.She apparently knows alot more about me than i do (which is funny because i think my family would die if they knew the truth about me - Thus the lies i tell them or the sins of omission).But she insists on telling people around me about all the bad in me and never remembers the good in me so am thinking of just blocking her from my life.The last 2 years have been alot better because she has been living and working in a different country,but now she is coming back for good and the worst bit is,she is going to be my boss.How unfair can life get?But am looking for a way to keep her out...thinking of moving out so that my mum can stop being her informant!Then again,once upon a time,she was like my best friend and maybe that's where we need to go back to,but how do i tell her to keep out of the really personal stuff?
Then there is my mother who no matter how much she says she hates me,loves me to a fault.We were just the 2 of us all that time when we lived in Mombasa.Then she met this man (to be fair he had been part of her life before i joined her).He wasn't a hindrance and still isn't(to some degree),i sometimes act like he is an intrusion,but he wasn't one till recently,but that i will not go into.But my mum and I,we have always had our really bad days and some really bad things have happened to both us and each one separately but knowing my mother is always there for me has been a very big comfort.She doesn't say she loves me,but i know she does from all the things she does for me.Sometimes when i do something bad (when i fuck up,i seriously FUCK UP)she tells me she hates me but last year was such a learning about my mum for me.When i left home to get married and things didn't work out,she asked me to come home and she doesn't talk about that bit or my ex,its like that never happened but she constantly reminds me of my stint in Mombasa and the bad choices i have made.She makes so much  noise about Kush and i get why,she grew up in Eastlands and saw how badly it turned out for most of her peeps and much as i sometimes want to tell her am not them,deep down inside me i know she only means the best for me.She hates that i smoke (cigarettes) and i drink,seeing as she doesn't drink (anymore.Once upon a time she did and bought me my first redds and Smirnoff ice when i was still underage)but she says that she will toleratee the drinking and cigarettes,just not the kush...Maybe i do need to check myself on that.But she makes it sound like am hooked (which am not) i smoke up once in a while when i have too much on my mind and alcohol doesn't seem to go down my throat (sometimes i cant swallow even a sip) and its not an everyday thing so wont she just let me be?(then again,which parent ever lets their child be?).Then there is the school thing,she has been singing to me that i should go back to school.Not that i don't want an education,i just don't want to sit in a class so i have applied for an online study programme and i haven't told her yet.I want to just surprise her with a degree.But will someone please tell her to stop hustling me?She says i have bad friends who don't advice me because i have refused to change.What she doesn't know is that all my friends (true friends that is) give me the same advice that she gives me,i just take it in and do something about it and sometimes i cry about it because i think am such a failure and sometimes i simply choose to ignore it.But i remind myself that having a job at 22,earning my own money is a big step.I have been working for so long
Then there is the Aunt who speaks without thinking.This one has done so much bad for me that i want nothing to do with her.I hate her husband and that she doesn't get why is beyond me.I think he is a womanizing asshole,but then,who am i to judge?I just hate the fake smiles she gives me and the fake interest in what i do.She complains that i don't talk to her,but she doesn't talk to me either,she looks for me for gossip and to find something to tell her sisters.It was not always like this between us,we used to be close once upon a time and i wish we could go back there.But i don't trust her enough!
These 3 women have been the pillars of my life.My mothers and the ones that helped to spoil me as a child.But in adulthood,i find them increasingly difficult to deal with.Bottom lline is,i love them and wouldn't want to live without them.